The older I become the more aware I am of what I do not want in my life. It use to be I would appease people. I would accept invitations to go places just to show I cared about them. I would allow people to come to my house to display my hospitality. Apparently, I was not comfortable with me. I was not comfortable with my stance on life, my decisions to believe what I want, nor my ability to enjoy myself by myself. Well, not by myself. I have Clarence. We have each other.
I have decided to make a chance. I won’t attend events just to say I was there. I won’t accept invites just to please those who submitted the invite. There has to be some structure in my life. I must choose my time wisely, as time is precious.
My decisions to spend time with people will be based on a few factors:
- Will our time together add anything [good] to my life?
- Will our time together add anything [good] to their life?
- Will our time together increase the Kingdom?
This became very apparent to me in recent months. In August my uncle died of cancer. Most of the family traveled to Indy to celebrate his life. While people were traveling, his son experienced the death of his mother-in-law. While we were settling back into our lives after the funeral(s), my uncle’s granddaugther died. Less than two months later, my step-mother’s mother died.
While I was not close to all of these people, death takes a toll on every family. Either you are mourning the lost of someone or supporting those mourning. It is tiring, trying, and tough. But, in the midst of it all, there are cherished moments. Those moments allow you to be grateful for the family. Those moments give us an opportunity to give thanks to God that no matter how dysfunctional we are, we are still family.
During my recent funeral travel, I spent time with family I usually don’t see. It gave me the opportunity to learn the behaviors and characteristics of a group of people not very different from who I am.
All in all, I suggest everyone to spend time with family. Spend time with family who will add to your life. Don’t judge them on who you want them to be. Don’t judge them on who they were once before. Enjoy the moments of laughter. Enjoy the smiles. Enjoy the love, even if it is brief.